Think of the any movie you love. Before it was ever cast, before it was costumed, before it was filmed, it was an idea in someone’s head. It was a book and then it was a script. You can think of a script as the bones that you hang a story on. It also became for me a way to force my will on the future. I use the word “force” with caution, but I don’t know another way to put it. I was telling my own story, not of the past, but of the future. I fleshed out my own movie. Scripts can be written for anything: for what you want your life to look like in 10 years, what kind of partner you hope to find, your perfect home. But I wrote it to save my life – I don’t know that it did, but it certainly worked for my meeting with the M.D.
When I was diagnosed, the first script I wrote concerned my appointment for consultation with the surgeon. It turned out very detailed and intricate because I felt like this was going to be my one chance for life. I was very much at sea and this script was my life preserver. So I put all I had into it. It was 7 handwritten pages long and began with leaving the house and the kind of traffic I would encounter, all the way to getting home from the appointment (boy, does fear focus your mind). I wanted EVERYTHING to go perfectly for me and so I took nothing for granted – not even traffic jams or car breakdowns. But before I even started to write, I had to know what I wanted. Here’s what I wanted: I wanted the truth. I wanted to know exactly what the complications of surgery would be. I wanted to know what my life would be like after the surgery. What my chances of living would be with the surgery and without. I wanted a doctor who was honest and straightforward, who would not sugarcoat anything, who was experienced and caring. And I’m telling you, I got everything I wanted (I discuss this in The Whipple/First Steps).
There is some kind of magic involved with scripting. I can’t tell you why it works like it does, only that it certainly has worked for me. It’s as if you take the first step, and Spirit takes your hand, then expands it into something with power, meaning and potency. There are rules for writing these kinds of scripts. I had learned these over several years of classes and I’ll share what I know with you.
1. Have an intention and write it down (in my case for example, it was to understand completely what my situation was and my options). Then state the intention at the top of the page. It can be several sentences if needed, but it is better if it is rather streamlined and straightforward. This is the core of the script. Whatever else is written will be in service to this core.
2. Say a little prayer, send up a little note to the universe asking for help and blessings on the script. Somehow bring the sacred in.
3. Keep it positive. Say “I will have a smooth, safe, fast trip” not “I will not be in any traffic jams.” This is very important. I find myself slipping into the negative, so I reread everything twice to make sure I am asking for what I want, not what I don’t want.
4. When the script is complete, reread it with emotion, reread it as if it is happening right at this moment, seeing it as if you are present in that moment. This is really important; let it feel real. Let the emotions flow; feel deeply. Whatever is asked for: a compassionate doctor, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, a friendly face, feel how it would be to sit across from the doctor and experience connection with her, feel her take your hand and listen. In each part of the script, feel it deeply. Envision it. See it in the mind’s eye, playing out. Inhabit this script. Let it come alive.
5. Once it is felt as deeply as possible, let it go. Know that it is done and it will happen. If knowing it is done is too big a step, just let it go. Don’t worry about it anymore. I saved mine, but some people actually burn theirs, seeing that smoke rising as if it itself were a prayer. At this point, the work is done, now just relax.
6. A person can only do this for themselves. A script cannot be written for other people. Everyone has free will, and we may not interfere with others. It probably wouldn’t work anyway, but just a reminder. Scripting of course can be taught to others, say children, if that’s important.
A script can be written for surgery, reaction to medication, your grand-daughter’s wedding. So much lends itself to this.
